I Don't Belong Here
by pumpkin99
Summary: Post S2 E21. After returning from the alternate Voyager, Harry feels that he doesn't belong.


**Recently I've been watching Voyager for the first time, and I actually kind of love it. This story is based after S2E21. I thought it was crazy that Kim was so chill about the alternate Voyager being blown up, so I wrote this short fic about his reaction to it.**

Harry Kim breathed in deeply, taking in the calm setting around him. Crickets chirped all around him amongst the trees and grass and flowers. A stream bubbled nearby. Above him, the sky was dark, the moon a barely visible sliver. He lay on his back in the grass, looking up. Every couple of seconds a meteor would dash across the sky, some for longer than others, some brighter than others.

Behind him, there was the unmistakable sound of a door chirping. He sighed, and the brief immersion was broken. It was obvious now - there was no smell of soil and flowers. His back wasn't getting wet from dewdrops, and there were no uncomfortable rocks one might accidentally sit on. The temperature was a perfect 78 degrees. Harry had programmed it that way. He made a note to add a little discomfort - for realism.

"Come," He called, slightly exasperated. The artificial lights of Voyager shone down on his face and he groaned. "You're ruining my night vision."

"Sorry, Harry, but I was under the impression you were coming to the cafeteria for the party." Of course. Tom Paris. Why'd he have to be so damn persistent? "Instead you're laying in a field in - what?"

"It's Switzerland. Now, can you shut the door, _please_?" Harry heard a sigh but the light disappeared. He felt Tom sit next to him in the grass.

"So why'd you bail on me? All night I've had to put up with everyone by myself." Tom said, obviously joking, but he seemed a little hurt underneath his shield of sarcasm.

Harry shifted in the grass, putting his hands behind his head. "I am sorry, Tom. I just didn't really feel like being around a lot of people."

Tom was silent for a moment, laying down as well. "You've seemed off ever since you came from the mirror Voyager."

Harry said nothing. A particularly bright meteor streaked by low in the sky, near a mountain peak. "That one was bright. Back in San Francisco, I couldn't dream of having a view of the stars like this."

"Y'know, on Boephus IV, they have incredible meteor showers all year round. Hundreds of meteors an hour. Why are you watching this lame one?" Tom teased, elbowing Harry playfully, but Harry didn't seem very amused.

"Well Boephus IV might be beautiful, but I would give anything to be back on plain old Earth right now." Harry said somberly.

Tom pulled at the grass. "Yeah, you're right. I spent my whole youth wishing anything I could get away from that rock. But what I wouldn't give to go back…"

Several minutes passed along with several meteors. Paris knew he really should get back to the party, as he was hosting it and had promised only to be gone a few minutes, but he couldn't bring himself to get up. Harry really was an excellent programmer, he was slowly finding himself absorbed in the holodeck program.

"Every since I came through the rift, I've felt like an outsider." Harry said suddenly, staring upwards.

Tom turned to look at him, furrowing his brows. "Harry, no one thinks that about you! You did what you had to do. In fact, you're considered a hero. You saved Samantha's baby."

"No, you don't understand." Harry snapped. He brought his hands up to rub his face. "I know that everyone accepts me, but I can't stop thinking about the other ship. I - I'm not from here. We each have different experiences. And the crew - _my _crew, was murdered as I escaped."

Tom sat up, facing his friend, but Harry refused to meet his gaze. "That's crazy and you know it! The rift only existed for - what, a couple of hours? Before that all of our experiences are identical."

The scientist just shook his head. "I mean, I just left and immediately replaced my crew with new versions of themselves without a second thought. I mean, that's horrible, right?"

"If my place was reversed, if _I _was on the ship that was destroyed, this is what I would want you to do." Tom said, looking out at the mountains. "You were dead for a few hours, Harry. You were taken away from this reality, so don't you think it's only fair that you would be returned?"

"I don't know what's right, Tom." Harry finally said, sitting up. "But thanks for trying to make me feel better. I think I just need some time to adapt."

"Well, luckily time is in abundance out here in the Delta Quadrant." Tom said, gesturing outwards, and he won a small chuckle. "Y'know what? Screw the party. It was lame anyway. What d'you about hanging out and wasting some of our replicator rations?"

Harry smiled. Sometimes Tom Paris could be the most insufferable guy, but he was a great friend when he needed to be. "That sounds really nice."


End file.
